52nd City

Our Man in Bonnaroo

I've known Pablo Weiss since sometime in the early-'90s and he's still capable of making me laugh, often in a way that's suspiciously similar to the famed cartoon character of the era, Beavis. So, I was amused to get an e-mail from Pablo on his Bonnaroo experience. Feeling that the couple dozen folks who got the original note weren't enough, I asked if we could reprint it, which he agreed to, providing I cleaned up a few copy elements. The wacky, off-color stuff, though, could remain intact. Thanks, dude!

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I had the opportunity to attend Boonaroo Music & Arts Festival in Manchester, Tennessee this last Thursday-Sunday. To say the least, it was quite an experience. I had some observations and since I am an over-opinionated loudmouth, I thought I would humor you with my thoughts, just for fun.

I would like to first off like to state that if the approximately 90,000 people that I camped with are the future of America, than we are in grave danger. It was like every slacker, fuck-up freak, and fruit and vegetable that I ever met were rolled into one. As our vehicle slowly inched onto the grounds (basically
huge fields)there were some cop cars lined up on the side. Handcuffed and sitting with his back against the front bumper was a pencil-neck hippie-type with about five pounds of mushrooms piled on the trunk of the car. I thought that the retail price in the mushroom market just went way up because the loss of supply. Little did I know, but it was not even a dent in the supply.

Everyone was, however, quite friendly and if I could live my life in such a consequence-free society with easy access to a plethora of recreational drugs, cool original music, with little sexual mores than I am in. Not that I was hooking up, or tripping (I retired after my last trip to A-Dam) but I did enjoy those who did partake, especially the young girls who frolicked around topless with their budding breasts and pert nipples decorated with a variety of body paintings and piercings. Before I start to go in another direction, I would like to give a review of the musical acts that I saw...

Top 10

1. Wolfmother - Talk about kicking ass and taking names later! Wow, these guys really rock! Sounded like Sabbath in their good days mixed in with some Triumph and the keyboards of Kansas.

2. Mute Math - These guys are so serious that the drummer duct taped his headphone around his head so they would not fall off as they ripped through a 90-minute set. One hippie got so worked up he charged the stage naked and danced like Beatle Bob for two-three minutes before being escorted out by
security. The music was quirky pop and the performance made it sound so much better. They smashed up their their stuff at the the end of the show which was a nice touch.

3. String Cheese Incident - I know what you are thinking - the guy who thinks that the Dead blow small dogs liked this? I'm not going to admit that I liked it, but G-D I had a blast! Keller Williams joined them and did the Bee Gees hit "Stayin' Alive" and brought the house down. One could not help but have a
great time with such wild freaked out crowd.

4. Jam Session with Ben Harper, John Paul Jones, and some drummer - When they played "Dazed and Confused" it made this middle-aged white boy's skin tingle. Rumors abounded about Zeppelin reuniting - of course.

5. Hot Chip - Like Mute Math, I did not know these guys before Bonnaroo. They got that appealing combofor me - the electronica fused with the traditional rock instruments. They are from London so they already are cooler than you and I but I would seriously recommend their CD.

6. North Mississippi All Stars - Saw these guys yesterday (Sunday) after drinking beer in the 95-degree sun for four hours and felt like expiring, then these guys really picked me up. Saw them in the '90s and might have booked them into the Side Door in it's day (my memory is not too good), but forgot what talented musicians these guys are. Wow, these guys have a tight, tight jam.

7. Kings of Leon - I don't exactly know why, but I really like these guys.

8. The Hold Steady - Another one of those over-the-top performances. Took better-than-okay material and just fucking rocked the house. The music is catchy and the band gives a fine performance.

9. Franz Ferdinand - A trendy pick, but they were good. Had good give and take with the audience and the songs other than their popular ones blended nicely with the set.

10. Brazilian Girls - Another electro-pop girl band which definitely has its angle. Another cool band that I only got to know at Bonnaroo

The worst four, starting from the worst.

1. Galactic - They added rappers to their entire show: and it was God Awful. Several years ago now, I saw Public Enemy at The Aragon Brawlroom and thought to myself if I don't dig these guys live, that maybe live rap shows are really not that good. It ruined the show so completely - there really were no synergies. The smell of the septic vacuum cleaning out the latrines 50-feet away was more enjoyable.

2. White Stripes - It started out bad where they booked them at a stage that was not big enough; there are open fields in fronts of all stages. The place
could probably accommodate 15-20,000 and there were probably 40-50,000 people there. It was a buzz kill after seeing the N. Miss. All Stars! Standing in the sun several hundred feet away I saw two people who were about as un-harmonic as you could get. It was so bad that I left early to get a nice spot for Widespread Panic; that's pretty bad. When I got to Widespread Panic, I did meet a nice young man with his hot young girlfriend (who claimed to be from Philly) who tried to sell me a drug that I had not heard of, but it came in white crystals. I politely declined further adding to my concerns that I am getting old and conservative.

3. The Decemberists - I know that these guys are hot and just sold out The Pagent, but I just did not get it. Maybe I am not sophisticated enough, but these guys left me limp and wilty.

4. Ween - What a cool band and a nothing set. Hardly played one song that I recognized from their fairly deep catalog. The LSU coeds behind me smoking a blunt were more entertaining.

Other bands of note...

The Police - Let's get something straight, Sting is a wanker that lives in a castle in the British Isles. He is pretentious and his solo career has done little else than give me a big soft-on. However, it's pretty cool going to a show that you know ever song from their tight career. The set started with "Message in a
Bottle," and stayed predominantly on their first three albums. Luckily "Every Breath you Take" was the encore so I could thankfully not hear it for 2,456th time.

Tool - I don't get it. It was not a bad concert, but I just don't get into it. A word of advice - don't tell a Tool fan that it just sounds like an updated
Metallica. They will be extremely insulted.

Widespread Panic - These guys are the most unimpressive looking sorts, however, they played a tight set from 8:30 Sunday night until just after midnight without a break of more than two-minutes. From what I understand they have a new guitarist; whoever this dinosaur is, he really, really could jam the guitar.

Junior Brown - Made his whole band wear coats and ties in sweltering heat. He, of course, had the Ten Gallon hat.

Marta Wainwright - Same whiny singer songwriter as her brother Rufus but less talented.

Clutch - About what you would expect that sounds more-and-more like Southern Rock.

Tea Leaf Green - Jam band from San Francisco; luckily, I was stoned when I saw them.

Tortoise - They were aw' right.

Dick Thompson Band - Made me feel young.

STS9 - A cool electronica project.

Damian Rice - Boring, but I did meet a young man with his first facial hair growth with a pentagram painted on his chest and 666 on his back. I, coincidental, was wearing a King Diamond shirt that I stole from Abbatista with some good devil stuff on it. I complimented his good sense, and recommended that he read "The Satanic Bible" by Anton LaVey.

Flaming Lips - Good set for a washed-up band.

Fountains Of Wayne - Fun pop band.

I made some nice friends there, mostly slackers than hung around the campsite because with had those little camping chairs and occasional food and booze. They, of course, had weed to barter. My favorite friend was a tie between Brent, the 19-year-old Domino's driver from Aurora, Illinois and Chris the 22-year-old, somewhat college student who just got a 0.9 GPA because he could not make it to his morning classes at Colorado State. He was tripping on Wednesday night and made his way to the festival and coincidentially set up his tent next to me.

I guess Burning Man is next on my Tour De Freak.

Pablo Out